Ah, the morning shower person. Watch, as he crawls out of bed dragging the duvet with him. Soon he will find his way out of the bed sheets and emerge bipedal. It’s fascinating.
The morning shower person’s eyes haven’t fully opened yet — in fact, even the morning light seeping in is too much to bear, causing him to moan loudly as he scampers about, looking for the shower door. It’s a delicate process. One wrong move and he might end up throwing his precious phone at the wall out of sheer frustration.
Yet, as vital as the morning shower dance may be, the real troubles of his day are only beginning. If he cannot find food, a mate, gainful employment, the means towards a cultivated personality and a sense of purpose by sunset, he’s as good as dead. For it is then… that the night shower people come out.
Nimble yet possessing a formidable build, and able to see in the dark, the night shower person is the complete antithesis of his morning counterpart. Where morning shower people like to huddle in groups and groom each other’s hair, the night shower person is a solitary predator, one who prowls the nightlife making dark thoughts. He can pounce between bars and other watering holes and ambush females with well-rehearsed pickup lines — as many as six a night.
Finally, the void overpowers him and he stumbles up the stairs and straight at the fridge, looking to scavenge. Watch, as the morning shower person cower in fear. His nemesis shows no mercy as he moves about the flat knocking things off. He even farts. Now the shower turns on, and the morning shower person hides his head under the pillow, clutching at the hope that his opponent will once again pass out under the water. There is only a little danger left.
the Budafoki amended 